Perspective

As I imagined, because last week was a bit easier, this week has been hard, for no reason other than the reality hitting me more often and more clearly than before.

At random times throughout the day my brain snaps back into the realization that Ryan is not here, that I can’t call him or see him or hold him ever again, and that reality breaks be multiple times per day.

Last night Richard said something to me that really helped me / gave me a better perspective. I said as days pass it hurts more because I feel further further away from Ryan from the last time, I spoke to him from the last time I saw him.

Then Richard said why don’t you look at it from the other side and start thinking about every day bringing you closer to the next time you’ll see him in the next time you’ll be with him. And at that moment, it helped to change my perspective and start feeling like every day. Will bring me closer again to